This is an archive of a site called The Circumcision Letters, a site where you could write open letters regarding your personal experience with circumcision. (The site is no longer operational, but we decided to retain the letters that had been published because they are too important to lose. You can also still post your own letter, below, which will appear with all of the archived ones,)
Before we get any further, we should point out that the site is not only against all non-consensual circumcision, but is also in favour of it being made illegal. So, if you want to post pro-circumcision propaganda, this is NOT the site for you!
Who is it for, then?
Well, it’s for:
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- People who were circumcised as children (without their full informed consent) and who are now angry or upset that it was done to them.
- People who were circumcised as children (without their full informed consent) and who wish to forgive either those who were involved in the decision to circumcise them or those who performed the operation.
- People who chose to be circumcised once they reached the age of legal consent and who now regret that they made that choice.
- People who chose to be circumcised once they reached the age of legal consent and who are angry that they were misled or lied to about the procedure, benefits, and risks.
- Parents who regret allowing their children to be circumcised.
- One parent who is angry that the other parent insisted that their child (ren) be circumcised.
- Intact men who sometimes feel like freaks because of the normalization of the circumcised penis. Women have made fun of them, accused them of having a disgusting penis, and refused intimacy with them for that reason alone.
- Women whose sexual pleasure has been adversely affected by circumcision or who have otherwise been impacted by the circumcision industry.
- Parents who are angry at the medical professionals who misled them or lied to them about circumcision, and the risks inherent in this surgery.
- Medical professionals who previously recommended or performed circumcision and who now regret those actions.
The letters will typically be written to parents, children, or medical professionals.
It was our hope that the writing and sharing of these letters would provide some measure of emotional relief for those who wrote them. We felt that providing a space for people to express anger, regret, or even forgiveness, would help them on their journey toward facing and constructively contributing to a resolution of the issue of genital mutilation. Furthermore, by allowing the public to access this site and read the letters written, it was our hope to broaden the awareness of the repercussions of circumcision.
Although The Circumcision Letters site is no longer operational, you can still submit a letter using the form below.
With that said, here are the letters:
My story with circumcision
My name is b.nour eddine, I am 25 years old.
I am from Algeria and I am against circumcision.
Circumcision is a crime and genital mutilation.
My story with circumcision began when I was circumcised when I was 5 years old. On that fateful day, a natural part of my genitals was amputated without any medical reason and against my will. I remember having normal, intact genitalia. I remember the feeling of having the foreskin. I remember what my body looked like before it was mutilated. I lived the first five years of my life with my natural body, which I was born with, and I did not suffer from any health problem, being normal.
I remember the day of the circumcision, I woke up early that day. They dressed me in new clothes, then my father took me in that morning to the clinic where the crime took place. I was unaware of what was about to happen to me exactly. But I knew it wouldn’t be pretty and something painful would happen to my penis.
I was afraid because I didn’t know what would happen to me exactly. And because I had bad previous memories about my older brother’s circumcision. The thing I remember the most was the sound of his crying and screaming in pain after the end of the operation.
After I arrived at the clinic, my stress and anxiety were increasing for the fear of the unknown. I’m starting to see new faces of people that I don’t know and have never seen before. Then, when the expected moment came, I was taken to the room where the crime took place. My father was in the room with me, but I don’t remember exactly how many other people were in the room. Maybe it was five or six people.
I was put on the bed lying on my back, then my genitals were exposed, and my father and the rest of the other men grabbed me by the hands and feet, and in the end I was pinned down unable to move or resist.
In those moments, I was not looking down at my genitals, but rather looking up at the ceiling. It was embarrassing and strange for me that my genitals were exposed and touched by and in front of people who were strangers to me, even with my father in the room with me.
Then the operation began. First, I felt a slight pain when the doctor pulled my foreskin hard, then I felt cold metal tools touching my penis, and after a few seconds I cried out in terror. I felt the worst pain I’ve ever had in my entire life.
Until now, I can’t find the right words to describe that pain.
I have gone through several physically painful experiences in my life but none of them came even close to the pain I felt that day.
I do not know how many seconds or minutes passed, but it was terrifying and unbearable , and I was screaming and crying and trying to move to escape from this horrific situation, but to no avail. Until I passed out from the pain.
After few minutes I woke up. I was still lying in the same bed, and the doctor was wrapping bandages on my penis, after which my father carried me in his arms and took me out of the clinic and brought me home. And I was in a state of shock, I couldn’t do anything, I couldn’t even cry or talk.
My parents received congratulations from the family members, and the amputation of a part of my body was celebrated, and money and gifts were given to me for the cutting of a part of my body.
Time passed and I grew up like the rest of the children in my community, believing that circumcision is a normal thing that all males around the world go through.
Deep inside me during my childhood years I knew there was something wrong about this practice. Why it should happen? And why should we cut off parts of children’s genitals? But how do I know? In my society, I was raised that this is normal and a religious practice that must be applied.
But the truth will not remain hidden forever. Over the years, many situations and occurrences have passed that made me doubt and wonder why we do this practice? And is it beneficial or harmful? Going by discovering that there are classmates from school who have not undergone circumcision (although their number is very few in my country) to discovering that most males in the world are not circumcised and that circumcision is practiced only among Muslims, Jews and some other cultures . And to my hearing from time to time about accidents and medical errors that occurred during the circumcisions, which led to death or amputation of the penis of the victims. And my discovery that there is another thing, which is female circumcision, which I did not know existed because it does not happen in my country. But the strange thing is that everyone used to describe it as a crime and genital mutilation, and they were fighting it and issuing laws to prevent it, despite their complete disregard for male circumcision.
All these things that I went through in my childhood and teenage years eventually led me to search for this topic, especially since we have become in the age of the Internet. And it is easy to access any information we want.
In the beginning, I knew that circumcision was unnecessary and that it was a procedure without any benefit, but I thought that it was not harmful (except for cases of medical errors or various medical complications that could occur during the circumcisions ). This happened when I was 19 or 20 years old. and I didn’t care much about it at that time.
However, my interest in circumcision has returned in recent months, thanks largely to Dr. Sami Aldeeb.
I was following his posts on social media, and he was talking about circumcision a lot, and I discovered that he has a whole book on this topic.
I was surprised that I did not pay much attention to the issue of circumcision before, although it was a painful experience and caused amputation of a natural part of my body.
So I started researching and diving into this topic. It was simple for me, and I did not find any difficulty in accepting the truth. All the evidence indicates that circumcision is a crime and is harmful, and there is no benefit from it.
I discovered the functions of the foreskin, which I was denied . And I discovered the various negative effects of circumcision. It was easy to see that the alleged benefits of circumcision are just nonsense and absurdities being promoted by religious groups that practice circumcision or by doctors who benefit financially from circumcision.
Does any sane person believe that cutting off a natural part of the human body that has functions is beneficial and not harmful?!
After I researched this topic and learned the truth about circumcision and its harms, I knew the functions and importance of the foreskin. Now I feel anger, sadness, and heartbreak for what I have lost and what was stolen from me and I am jealous of normal men who have not had their genitals mutilated.
I feel like a part of my body has been stolen from me forever.
Every time I look at my penis, I see something abnormal. I see distortion. And I know that my natural body, which I was born with, is not supposed to look like this.
I love and respect my body. That is why I am angry and dissatisfied with what happened to me because I did not agree to amputate any part of my body.
My body was mutilated when I was a child, unable to resist or object.
It is not only about the damages of circumcision, the functions of the foreskin, or the pain of circumcision. But also with my dignity as a human being and my right to preserve my whole body and my right to be protected from amputation of any part of my body without my consent and my right to freedom of choice.
Circumcision is genital mutilation and a flagrant violation of one of the most important human rights to maintain physical integrity.
And a violation of the right to freely choose what one wants to do with his body.
Circumcision of infants and children is not a medical practice but a crime.
Circumcision violates the medical ethics.
In medicine, there are two basic rules that cannot be ignored before performing surgeries or before amputating an organ from the human body.
The two rules are the consent of the patient and the existence of a medical necessity to perform the surgery.
And always surgical operations or amputation of any part of the human body is the last solution that the doctor should suggest, and that is only when all other methods fail to treat the disease.
In infant circumcision, both conditions are not respected.
First, it is performed without necessity or medical reason.
Secondly, it is done without the consent of the owner of the body.
The claim that circumcision is a choice of the parents is unacceptable because the children are not the personal property of the parents, but they are an independent entity in themselves.
Parents have the power to make decisions on behalf of their children, but under conditions that must not be exceeded. Among them is not to make permanent changes in the child’s body, such as cutting off a part of his body, without any medical necessity.
Child circumcision cannot be tolerated and accepted for religious reasons, because this practice violates the child’s right to maintain the integrity of his body and his right to freedom of choice.
What are the other organs that will be allowed to be amputated from the bodies of children if there are religious reasons that make parents want to cut them from the bodies of their children?
Whoever wants circumcision for religious reasons or for any other reason can choose this procedure after he becomes an adult. and It is done with his personal consent, with his knowledge of the consequences and results of his choice.
Where are the organizations that claim to defend human rights?
Where is the United Nations? Where is UNICEF? Where is the World Health Organization? Where are the governments of countries that claim to defend human rights and children rights? These criminals and hypocrites did not just remain silent and ignore this crime. But in fact, they are supporting and promoting this crime using absurd and unfounded arguments such as fighting HIV!
Where are children’s rights organizations? Why do we not hear any voice from them even though this crime is committed daily on thousands of male children around the world!
The reason is clear: these organizations and governments do not really care about human rights as they claim, but rather care about achieving their personal interests only.
These organizations and governments are run and controlled by parties that do not want to criminalize male circumcision and want it to continue.
If an issue (for example, male genital mutilation) harms their interests or affects their ideas and beliefs, they will ignore it and ridicule it.
They are not interested in defending human rights except when they have an interest or when they are pressured by a party stronger than them.
These criminals and hypocrites revealed their true nature to the world, and only ignorant and fools will trust them anymore.
Finally, I want to send a message to everyone, male and female, but especially to the men who are victims of this crime. Speak up, do not remain silent. It is our responsibility and our moral duty to fight this crime and protect future generations from it. A crime has been committed against us and we must not accept it and remain silent. We must act and demand the issuance of laws that criminalize and prevent the circumcision of children and infants, and that punish anyone who commits this crime.
Dear urologist, parents and myself
When I discovered my phimosis in September of 2015, I got surprised, and that feeling of pain when retracting was an unknown feeling to me. It got me scared.
But I looked online and saw what it was and saw different ways of solving it. I knew from the start I did not want a circumcision, even if I barely knew what it was, there were creams and stretching or a more minimal procedure to be done.
So i did not get scared much. And thanks mom for at least being against circumcision at first.
But dad, why did you have to tell me I’d be like you if I choose circumcision? Did you think it would make us closer? Couldn’t you inform yourself on my condition instead of downplaying it? Was it that hard for you?
I can’t entirely blame you but I wish I’d never asked help from you in the first place. Why did I have to be the son of a circumcised man who never thought about it?
But then I went to the doctor. He looked at it and sent me to the urologist.
I can’t remember why I was alone there. It was my first time being alone and having to make a choice so important.
You, urologist, treated me like some cattle. I was barely informed, had just showed my penis to a stranger and was asked on the spot to make a choice.
You did ask me about what I believe was a dorsal slit. But why did you tell me none of the benefits and just told me the bad aspects of it? I had been traumatized by keloids in my youth and of course you mentioned it. And you were quick to tell me it could just not work anyway.
And then you mentioned circumcision. But to tell me the truth about it and tell me the downsides of it was too hard for you? Aren’t you supposed to care for the well being of your patients? Since when does amputating a body part of someone seem like a reasonable solution?
You also could have reminded me of steroid creams and stretching, but since you did not care, you just didn’t do it of course.
Did I look like I had any idea when you asked me to choose one operation? Did I look like an informed guy that had thought well and see the ups and downs of each possibilities?
No, I got scared and chose the only option proposed to me where you omitted the downsides so easily. And so I was led to choose a date so quickly. You wanted me to do it in less than a week. At least I told you no I want it later.
And to my parents,
Did I look like I had any idea what I was choosing when I came back to you with the date set and the operation chosen? Why didn’t both of you research and ask around you for help on how to help your son? Why were you also so quick forgetting the other ways I had told you?
How come in both your minds, a body amputation was an actual way to go? I told you mom I could probably not handle both operation had I chosen the dorsal slit, but that really does not make sense when you think about it for more than 3 seconds, does it? The operation under anesthesia is nothing compared to living with the operation’s consequences.
And why dad would you just tell me again, I’ll be like you? Why could you not HELP ME? Was it so hard to look for information? I wish everyday you’d have at least just shut up. You really thought because you were mutilated at birth that I would like to be as well? What kind of world do we live in for it to be something someone actually thinks?
Who in their right mind would not at least try the way less horrible option? And those options were written on the circumcision shitty paper that the doctor had given! It was RIGHT THERE.
Would you both have cared more if I had discovered it earlier in my life? I was 21 already unfortunately.
And to me,
I’m so sorry. I’m sorry that you had to discover your phimosis at the happiest time of your life, when you were too blind to realize. When you were so eager to have sex and felt like you had to solve it quickly.
I wished I could have saved you. I wished I’d have kept my mouth shut and not trusted anyone but myself. I wished I had discovered it at another time, things could have gone so differently.
I’m so sorry I destroyed your dreams by getting scared at the doctor.
A letter of apology to my son
Dear Son,
I don’t know from where the human ability to rationalize, using outrageous and absurd ideas, in order to avoid guilt, comes from. You don’t have to go back many years to discover professional people in medicine stating: “newborn babies cannot feel pain.” REALLY?? ……WTH
Even though you by no means think this a tragedy (it is not to be expected anyone would say there is something “wrong” with their body), yet I hereby give you my heartfelt apology for allowing you to be circumcised.
I hope, someday, this barbaric practice will be only for the history books, and it will rightfully shock and horrify the readers.
Love,
Your Mother
CIRCUMCISION LETTER FROM SON (WITH RESTORED FORESKIN) TO MOTHER
Dear Mum,
I realise that, back in the early 1960s, when you signed the consent form permitting a doctor to circumcise me, you had no choice. Something was wrong with my foreskin; I recall you telling me that it had turned septic. In those days it was customary to cut off the foreskin to cure the slightest problem and you never questioned a doctor’s recommendation. It just wasn’t done back then. I am also pleased that you feel relieved about my decision to regrow it, which has improved my mental health no end.
Unfortunately, it is not possible for any individual who has any part of his/her genital organs surgically modified to “get over” that modification, however medically necessary it may have been at the time. Women often have mastectomies to save them from death from breast cancer. They often have their breasts reconstructed subsequently. They still miss their original breasts. I love my regrown foreskin, but I still miss the foreskin that I don’t remember having. All most foreskin restorers want is parity of recognition with women who have breast reconstructions subsequent to mastectomies.
When I was a teenager, you repeatedly stressed the importance of “conformity” and of “not being different.” It was the 1970s and diversity was not a big thing back then. You chose my secondary school on the basis that its pupils were “like me.” Sadly, the operation to which you consented on my behalf left me with no choice but to be different. I was “like the other boys” in my class until the inevitable moment, twice a day, five days a week, when I stood elbow-to-elbow with them at the completely open urinal walls, unzipped my fly, pulled my penis out and started to urinate, and the second moment when, three times a week, I stripped naked and showered with these other boys. They found that I wasn’t like them at all. 99% of them had their foreskin. All were able to pass a straight stream of urine through it. In 7 years, not once did I observe a boy pull back his foreskin before urinating or whilst in the showers. A foreskin was an unofficial compulsory item of uniform at that school. And boy, was I body-shamed for not having one. It was considered character-forming, which was central to the ethos of a lot of schools at that time. In one religious education class dealing with the practices of Judaism, the teacher actually asked us all, “Who among you have been circumcised?” It is never possible to “get over” experiences of this nature and the more pressure is applied to do so, the more difficult the recovery process becomes.
Please don’t under-estimate the importance of the foreskin to the human male. It is a thing of beauty, to be cherished at all costs. I can’t tell you how spiritually uplifted I feel when I pee through my foreskin at a public urinal, just as my intact classmates did all those years ago. It’s 20 years since I completed my restoration process and I have not had a single urinary tract infection in all that time despite not once drawing my foreskin back to urinate. The head of the penis is an internal organ and I have no intention of exposing mine for anyone to see at a public urinal. “My body, my choice” means nothing if the individual cannot make a personal choice to put bodily integrity above personal hygiene.
I intend to devote the rest of my life to raising awareness of the trauma that circumcision causes. It is a subject which has been surrounded in taboos for far too long. Please give your unequivocal backing to my campaign; those males who have been genitally altered without their consent need to have a voice.
Lots of love,
XX
A post about the circumcision done to me by Doctor Marinova.
On 06.07.2021 I agreed to undergo the circumcision for medical reasons. I want to share that it was disgusting no prior information from the doctor about how it is done and in the end I was physically and mentally crippled.In my country it is done in an extremely disgusting way and they do not give information to the patients because many refuse. Well, Dr. Marinova, you crippled me, which I confirmed with an online consultation with a Russian urologist professor. I quote his answer very badly done you will be irrevocably scarred.For that I will never forgive you, many times I thought of finding you and cutting you but I refrained, if there is Hell there it will be seen and I will cut. And so for more than two years I have not had intercourse because the trauma of the mutilation has remained with me. If I had known, I would have lived with the fucking phimosis, but I would never go to bed. I am writing this post as a kind of warning to Bulgarians and Men around the world, decide very carefully before cutting yourself.
[Editor’s Note: Phimosis can be treated without amputating the foreskin.]
A Letter To My Late Father About My Feelings Regarding His Decision To Have Me Circumcised
Father,
I’m sure this letter will take you by surprise. You’ve never heard me talk like this before. I’ve tolerated crap from you before, such as being accused of being both homosexual (you were a homophobe and once said all homosexuals should be put up against the wall and shot) and a (heterosexual) sex maniac, but nothing comes close to what you did when I was a helpless infant.
If you still have no clue what I’m talking about, then I’m referring to your decision to have me circumcised.
I would really love to hear you try to defend that decision, because I know you don’t have a leg to stand on.
So, where to start?
Well, I remember you once telling me that circumcision was “just a quick snip”.
In spite of what you told me (which is probably what a doctor told you as you have few original thoughts of your own), it is not even close to being “just a quick snip”. It is an excruciating, barbaric procedure that is performed on young children who are strapped down, medically raped, and mutilated, all while fully conscious. I know you are a technophobe, but there are videos available these days that anyone can watch about any subject you could think of, and these include live videos of circumcision operations. I dare you to watch one of those and still say it’s “just a quick snip”.
If a doctor or nurse told you I slept through it, they were lying. Babies who are subjected to this horrific procedure scream so violently that they pass out from shock. Although I suspect you too were circumcised as a child, how would you like it, as an adult, if someone cut off your foreskin without anything other than a topical anaesthetic that does almost nothing to dull the pain? Do you really imagine you would sleep through it, without a sound?
So, I have to ask you, why the hell did you agree to have me mutilated like that?
You are probably shocked that I would use the word “mutilated”, but that’s exactly what it is!
Circumcision is not a therapeutic operation – because my foreskin was perfectly healthy at the time, and therefore did not require any form of treatment.
It is not medically necessary, regardless of what any doctors might have told you. (No medical association in the world recommends it.)
It is irreversible – once you’ve been cut, you have lost the most sensitive part of your foreskin, forever.
It might surprise you to know that the foreskin has over a dozen functions, and while many adult men say they have a perfectly satisfactory sex life, they have no basis for comparison because they have never had sex using an intact penis.
When I first had sex, I enjoyed it, but it was not the earth-shattering experience I’d been led to believe it might be. Maybe that was the first indication that circumcision had permanently ruined my chance of a fulfilling sex life, except I didn’t know enough to connect the dots back then.
It might indeed be satisfactory, but sex with an uncircumcised penis is so much better for both the man and the woman.
And, finally, circumcision leaves you with a deformed and scarred penis for the rest of your life.
If that doesn’t qualify as mutilation, I don’t know what does.
In addition to that, circumcised men are proven to have increased risks of erectile dysfunction, which typically becomes worse with age. And yes, now I’m middle-aged, I can tell you that the results of your inhumane decision to mutilate me are causing problems.
Now, you may say that you had no idea circumcision was so barbaric or caused so many problems.
And I don’t care about that, because that’s not really the main point.
Maybe you made the decision because the doctor either lied to you or misinformed you about the procedure (because doctors who perform circumcisions know precious little about the foreskin, other than how to amputate it). It had been known for almost ten years before I was born that removing the foreskin was not recommended – and yet you still chose to let them amputate the most sensitive part of my penis.
But I don’t care about what a doctor did or did not tell you either.
Another common reason for circumcising a young boy is so that he looks like his father in the penis department.
I hope to hell that’s not why you did what you did! Because if that was your reason, then fuck you! Why on earth would I want my penis to look like yours? Was it a form of revenge – you were circumcised so you thought I should suffer too?
Or did you make a life-changing decision for me because my mother preferred sleeping with circumcised men?
I hope and strongly suspect that wasn’t the case, given she was likely a virgin when you married (yes, I remember you bragging about sleeping around as a bachelor but wanting a virgin for a wife). I mean, why should a mother’s personal sexual preference for a mutilated penis result in her son’s healthy foreskin being amputated? (By the way, women typically prefer uncut men because it is more pleasurable and less painful for them.)
Maybe you were fed that bullshit argument about circumcised penises being easier to clean? If you couldn’t be bothered to learn how to teach me to clean an intact penis, what gave you the right to think you could prepare me for the real world, with all of its much greater challenges?
Here’s the real point: every single human being has a right to bodily autonomy. Only I get to choose what is done to my body.
Now, you may say it’s the parents’ rights to do what they think best, but a parent has no rights in this respect – only duties.
And it was your duty to protect me rather than doing what you wanted with my body.
Sadly, you chose not to do that. Instead, you:
- allowed some quack to permanently mutilate my penis
- violated my right to an intact body and took away my choice as to whether to be circumcised or not once I was old enough to understand the risks and benefits. (By the way, there are few, if any, benefits, but there are plenty of risks, including death!)
- condemned me (and my sexual partners) to a lifetime of sex that would never be as satisfying as it should have been.
If they had all the facts, no one would choose to be circumcised, either as infants or as adults. (Some adults today, who escaped circumcision as infants, do choose to have the operation performed, without being told all the risks, of course, and almost all of them regret it afterwards.)
I agree that parents do get to choose things such as what to feed their children, and what clothes they should wear, when they’re too young to make their own choices. But you do NOT get to choose an elective, non-therapeutic surgery that cannot be undone and that causes permanent harm and trauma.
As I said earlier, you would probably reply that you weren’t aware of any of these facts (or maybe you were and did it anyway, because you were not a good human being), but that’s immaterial. You made a decision about my body that was never yours to make. And for that, once again, fuck you!
So if you are getting the impression I’m angry, then well done! Yes, I bloody well am angry. Furious, in fact.
You were sexist, racist, and misogynist, and you didn’t like anybody who came from a foreign country or didn’t speak English, or anybody who was disabled. I don’t know what sort of role model you thought you were for me, but I soon decided that I did not want to be anything like you. I have actually gone out of my way to be as different to you as I can.
But there you are, and it feels as though you’re still screwing me around from beyond the grave. I mean, what sort of sick bastard allows anybody to cut off part of his son’s penis?
However, I digress. Let me finish by saying this: I only wish I could have this conversation with you in person because I would enjoy watching you try to defend the barbarism you sanctioned and seeing the realization sink in that if I’d found this information out before you died, I would have confronted you about it and then never have spoken to you or seen you ever again.
Your outraged, mutilated son.
Send Us Your Circumcision Letter
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